Bernie Borges [00:00:00]:
Hello, my midlife friend. This is Bernie Borges, your host of the Midlife Fulfill podcast. And this is episode 1 75, a takeaway episode from episode 174, my conversation with Clara Capano. You know the drill on takeaway episodes. I summarize key discussion points from the previous episode, and then I hone in on one key takeaway that I wanna emphasize to you. And then I issue you a challenge to consider on this topic. First, let me begin by reintroducing you to Clara Cappano. Clara is a successful entrepreneur who has experienced firsthand the struggle of balancing work and life.
Bernie Borges [00:00:44]:
Haven’t we all? Today, she is an author. She’s got 3 books to her name. She’s a keynote speaker and a coach. She’s always considered herself an overachiever, and she confesses to succumbing to the same routine that many of us have fallen into, which is characterized by striving to check off more and more of those boxes, such as attaining titles in our career, maybe driving a nice car, getting a big house, wearing a nice wardrobe, taking nice vacations, and generally showing the world that you are a success. Now, let’s be honest. Many of us, not all of us, but many of us can make the same confession. Not surprisingly, Clara soon found herself on a never ending hamster wheel feeling the strain of imbalance or as she calls it, a lack of harmony. Now realizing that this was a common struggle for both men and women, Clara made it her mission to challenge the societal notion that doing more is better.
Bernie Borges [00:01:49]:
That doing more is equal to success. So, she created a success model that she now shares through her speaking and her books and her coaching business and she walks the walk through her Legacy Success Method. And, she spells Legacy, clarat y, to play in her name. Now the clarity success method empowers others to gain balance or harmony as she says, in their life by prioritizing a healthy work life that defines success on their own terms. I love that. So to get to my takeaway, I want to summarize the key three points from our conversation on episode 174. Point number 1. Finding clarity in your vision.
Bernie Borges [00:02:40]:
Wow. This is huge. Clara shared her backstory and explained her Legacy Success Method, which is actually based on her personal journey to bring balance and intention into her life. Now, she emphasizes the importance of having a clear vision for your life, taking intentional actions, and balancing work with rest and recovery, and celebrating achievements every day. Number 2, align your values with your vision. This is also huge. We discussed the struggles that people experience when they’re trying to find balance in all aspects of life including career, relationships, health, and personal growth. She says it’s important to regularly revisit and align your current values with action create impact.
Bernie Borges [00:03:42]:
Again, huge. Clara expressed the impact of her legacy success method on her own life, describing how it has empowered her to be present, to understand the importance of rest, and to disconnect from work and maintain core relationships. Now those are 3 big discussion points, and the takeaway that I wanna share with you is all about vision. And I’m about to get probably the most personal that I’ve gotten on all my previous takeaway episodes. And I’m gonna be honest, I wish that I had discovered what it means to have a vision sooner in my life. In fact, it got me to thinking, why isn’t this taught in school? At least I wasn’t taught the meaning of vision when I was in school. Maybe it’s because of the schools that I attended. I don’t know.
Bernie Borges [00:04:37]:
Or maybe it’s because the educators who are responsible for creating the curriculum for children don’t themselves understand the meaning of vision. Alright. I’m gonna give them the benefit of the doubt and say that educators at the school district level understand the meaning of vision. After all, they’re adults. But maybe they don’t understand how profound it would be to empower kids to learn the meaning of vision and the impact of vision on their lives. Again, I wasn’t taught that. Now you might be thinking, kids are too young to understand the meaning and the impact of vision. And look, I don’t have a PhD in education, so I don’t know.
Bernie Borges [00:05:19]:
But, let’s say, for the sake of argument, that children under the age of 13 generally are not gonna fully understand the meaning and the impact of vision. But what about high school kids? By the time kids are in grades 9, 10, 11, 12, I mean, those are high school years, They’re taking advanced classes in subjects like math, science, and social studies. And kids at this age are capable of learning a lot of information. I dug up one example to share with you, and this is just one example. A young man by the name of George Wang, a senior at the Oklahoma School of Science in Mathematics. He recently made a discovery that disrupts a fundamental theory in chemistry. Now I admit, I know almost nothing about chemistry. But apparently, the carbon atom is proven to naturally form 4 bonds.
Bernie Borges [00:06:14]:
4. Okay? Now that’s considered basic chemistry. Well, this high school senior, again his name is George Wang, he set out to make 7 bonds. Not 5, not 6, but 7 bonds in a carbon atom. And you know what? He did it. He had his calculations verified and along with his teacher, published a peer reviewed paper about the discovery in a scientific journal. Wow. If a high school senior can make a first time scientific discovery, why can’t they understand the meaning and the impact of vision? Now, you might be thinking that science is left brain and maybe understanding vision might be more right brained.
Bernie Borges [00:07:02]:
And I admit there’s some logic to that. And I also know that not every high schooler makes new scientific discoveries like George Wang, but that’s not my point. My point is that if educators devoted time to the meaning and impact of vision in this age range, teaching kids in this age range about what vision is, maybe some of us might have discovered our purpose earlier in our lives. Now here on the Midlife Fulfill podcast, I have the privilege, and I mean privilege, of interviewing people from all walks of life, many of whom have discovered a purpose that is fulfilling to them. But what they all have in common is that they discovered this purpose in their forties or fifties or sixties and sometimes even beyond. I wish I had been taught the meaning and the impact of vision for my life when I was about 30 years old. And this is where I’m gonna get personal. So speaking again, for me, I don’t think I would have fully understood the meaning and impact of vision in my teens or my twenties.
Bernie Borges [00:08:11]:
Notice though I said fulfilled understood it. I wish I had access to a class on vision in my high school years. I really do. If that class was taught in an experiential learning method, also known as active learning, I would have been required to work on a project. In other words, I would have experienced something around this. And even though I don’t know for sure how much I would have embraced the meaning and impact of vision for my life at this time in my youth, I’m sure that the education would have been foundational for me. And there’s a very good chance, again, speaking for myself only, that the concept would have come into meaning for me in my thirties. Again, I’m speaking for myself because in my thirties is when my life circumstances began to formulate meaning.
Bernie Borges [00:09:04]:
This is the period in my life when I truly, truly began adulting. And I just had deeper thought about my purpose. This is when I think a foundational understanding of vision grounded in principles that might have been taught to me in a high school class setting would have come into play for me. And I’m pretty certain that I would have devoted more energy to understanding my vision and how I can harness it for purpose and meaning in my life if I had had that foundational education. The work that Clara Capano does is testimony to the fact that many adults lack a vision for their life. Let me say this another way. If this wasn’t true, there would be no audience for Clara. She wouldn’t even have a business.
Bernie Borges [00:09:51]:
Let me just give this to you in business terms. If a product or service is introduced to the market, and there’s no demand for it, the product or service doesn’t survive. It’s fitness 101. Well, Clara’s work is in demand because many people lack a vision for their life. And I’m so glad that Clara’s purpose is to help others understand their vision, their purpose. As for me, I began to understand the meaning and the impact of vision in my fifties, but I didn’t really take action on it until the current season of my life in my sixties. Now again, I’m speaking for myself. I know I’ve said that several times, but I just wanna really emphasize that.
Bernie Borges [00:10:36]:
And this is a deeply personal thing for me to admit on my podcast. I’m not even sure that I could admit this if I was speaking from a stage to a live audience where I’m looking people in the eye to the extent that you can look in their eyes from a stage. I’m admitting this on a microphone on my podcast where I don’t have to look at people. It’s still not easy, but I feel that it’s the right thing for me to do. I wish that I had known about vision 20 or 30 years ago. Even if my vision changed over time, which is okay and probably would have happened, at least I would have been leading my life with a plan. Imagine that, a plan for my life. Just saying that gives me chill bumps.
Bernie Borges [00:11:27]:
Instead, in the absence of a plan, I was caught in the current of life. Current is obviously a metaphor, right? I let that current just take me where it took me. So I created a life with a loving family, a moderately successful career, and many healthy relationships. But I can’t help but wonder how my life would be different if I had been driven by a vision 30 years ago. Now look, I I wanna be clear on one thing. I am not dwelling on the past. I’m not. And I’m certainly not whining about my life.
Bernie Borges [00:12:06]:
No way. I am very blessed. As I said, I’ve got a loving family, an okay career, and many great relationships. But what I am doing is looking forward with a vision, And I’m not putting age restrictions on my vision either. I am motivated by having an impact on people in any midlife season through creating self awareness. That’s what I’m driven by. So here’s my challenge to you. How are you reacting to my story? Is your story different than mine? Did you have a clear vision for your purpose and your mission when you were in your twenties or thirties? Or is your story similar to my story? Like me, I encourage you to be self aware and look forward, not backward.
Bernie Borges [00:12:59]:
All we can do about the past is learn from it. I have learned from my lack of vision in the past by pouring my heart and soul into my vision at this stage of life. I am looking forward, as I said, without regard for my age, and as long as God gives me breath, I will have a vision with purpose, with meaning, with balance. And I’ll do everything that I can to deliver on my vision. And I wish the same for you. Before I close out this episode, let me remind you to take my fulfillment survey. You’ve heard me talk about this. I am partnering research anonymously, meaning we don’t ask for your name or your email, by completing the survey which is linked up in the show notes for this episode.
Bernie Borges [00:13:53]:
I want to thank Clara Cappano for joining me on episode 174 on this very important topic. And I want to remind you that you can watch my video recording with Clara on episode 174 on the Midlife Fulfilled YouTube channel. That’s also linked up in the show notes page. Hey. My next guest episode features Vicki Dixon. Now I didn’t meet Vicki at Podfest. That’s right. We didn’t meet at Podfest, but we both attended Podfest, which is a podcasting event.
Bernie Borges [00:14:25]:
And I came across her content, and I was mesmerized. Vicky is an expert in human design. And Vicky explains the science of human design and then fascinates me with her read of my human design. Now, you’ll hear all about that on episode 176. You don’t wanna miss that episode. And, hey, if you’re a new listener, welcome. I invite you to hit the subscribe button on your podcast player so that you don’t miss this episode as well as future episodes. You know what time it is, my midlife friend? It’s that time when I remind you that if you’re 80% fulfilled, you’re doing great.
Bernie Borges [00:15:06]:
And if you wanna know how I know this, you guessed it, download my scorecard. I’ll see you on episode 176. I’ll see you then.
