Bernie Borges [00:00:00]:
Jen Hardy, welcome to the Midlife Fulfill podcast, a vulnerable conversations episode.
Jen Hardy [00:00:06]:
Thank you so much, Bernie. I am very excited to be here and talk to you today.
Bernie Borges [00:00:11]:
Thank you. Thank you, Jen. I’m very excited to talk with you. Let me give you, a little bit of an introduction. You are doing a lot of amazing things. You are a multifaceted content creator. You’re an entrepreneur. You focus on video and podcasting.
Bernie Borges [00:00:28]:
That’s kinda how we met. We met in the podcasting community. You host the Jen Hardy Show on YouTube and also the fabulous Over 50 podcast. Love that. And you’re the author of, I think, 4 books, maybe 5. I don’t know. You’ll we’ll we’ll catch up on that. And you’ve been in the podcasting space almost as long as I have, since 2017.
Bernie Borges [00:00:51]:
So you’re just a few years, behind me. I’m a 2013, but we’re we’re really close there. And, you know, in 2024, so I forgot to say happy new year. Here you are, the first episode of the brand new year 2025. And way back in 2024, as if it was that long ago, you won podcast of the year, and you launched your Jenn Hardy show on YouTube, which had a half a 1000000 views in its 1st 3 months. That is amazing. And you and your husband, Dave, have 7 children, which is also amazing. So, Jen, you’ve got all this amazing stuff going on in your life, both professionally and personally.
Bernie Borges [00:01:33]:
But I know a little bit about your background. Jen, you are not supposed to be here. You are not supposed to be here. So let’s begin with that story, your journey. And you know you know what I’m referring to.
Jen Hardy [00:01:48]:
I do. You know, it’s it’s interesting because, yeah. I’m definitely not supposed to be here. I I fell down the stairs a couple of times back in 2012 and didn’t wanna do anything about it. Long story short, my husband had had surgery. Go figure. And I didn’t have time to take care of myself. You know, I had 7 kids, and I was running around.
Jen Hardy [00:02:12]:
And my sister-in-law said, you know, you really should go to the doctor. People don’t fall down the stairs frequently. And, so I did, and they did a scan, and I had lost a lot of the muscle in my back. More than normal. More than just sitting around. It was a a concerning amount. And so they sent me to the doctor, and long story short, they diagnosed one of the two things I have quickly, which is called myasthenia gravis, and, it affects your muscles. And but they didn’t catch the muscular dystrophy, which is was it was what was taking getting rid of my muscles.
Jen Hardy [00:02:49]:
And because of that, they put me on super high doses of prednisone and to counterbalance my mood with that, because I don’t handle that well, gave me some medicine to calm me down and put me in a myasthenic crisis, which is where you don’t breathe and you go into the ICU and it is not fun to be in ICU when you’re conscious, let me tell you. And so I spent 6 separate weeks in 2014 in the hospital, in and out of these myasthenic crises, because the secondary medicine was making my lungs not work because it was calming my muscles down, and they didn’t know that I have a secondary muscle issue. So I had a massive surgery, and can I think of the word? A thymectomy. There’s a thymus gland that could cure you of the myasthenia in up to 10 years after the surgery. So I had it done. Didn’t seem to do anything. Had 20 rounds of IVIG, which is a IV therapy. It takes all day.
Jen Hardy [00:03:52]:
And so it was a whole thing. And I went to doctor after doctor after doctor, and nobody could figure out the secondary component because nobody
Bernie Borges [00:04:01]:
of a period was this, Jen? This sounds like it was many, many weeks.
Jen Hardy [00:04:04]:
2012 to 2017.
Bernie Borges [00:04:07]:
That’s a lot of months.
Jen Hardy [00:04:08]:
And in the meantime, in 2014, when I was in and out of the hospital, I had 5 teenagers, a 2 year old, and a 4 year old. And my husband was in the army, so he was gone 12 to 14 hours a day. So and I was in bed. I was actually in a wheelchair that year. Yeah. It was it was a lot. And finally, my doctor said, you know, there’s just nothing else we can do. So we’re gonna give you pain medicine, and I’m gonna make you as comfortable as I can, but you have about a year to live.
Jen Hardy [00:04:35]:
And then I went to my pulmonologist, my lung doctor, and she said, you know, your lungs are about to fail. Your it’s it’s my, diaphragm that wasn’t working because it’s a muscle. Right? She said it’s working about 20%, and you’re going to need to be on a ventilator full time. We can give you one for that’s a backpack. Don’t worry. You can go everywhere. You can do anything. You can live with it as long as you’re here.
Jen Hardy [00:05:00]:
And I thought, no. No. I don’t want that.
Bernie Borges [00:05:04]:
And And what year was that, Jen?
Jen Hardy [00:05:07]:
2018.
Bernie Borges [00:05:08]:
18. Okay.
Jen Hardy [00:05:10]:
2018. So yeah. Then so basically, I had a year to live and it was going to be wearing this thing. And I thought, no. I don’t. I don’t. I’m not ready. And I know that there are people that live with that, and and if you are somebody living with that, you know, I have all the respect and admiration in the world because I may end up there too at some point.
Jen Hardy [00:05:32]:
But I was determined to fight it. I and I just I don’t know what kicked in, Bernie. I don’t know. But I thought, no. I don’t want to do this. So but if I’m gonna go, I’m gonna have my family settled. So my older 5 children are out, they’re on their own, they’re successful, doing their things, but I have 2 children at home that are both autistic, and the thought of having them without a mom, it just seemed really sad. So my husband and I went on vacation.
Jen Hardy [00:06:00]:
We came to Florida. We found a place on an island. We could buy a house, and I thought that is where they need to be. Then if I’m not there, they’ve got the beach, they’ve got this perfect life, you know. And Bernie, it’s what I needed. Mhmm. Because here I am. And when I when we left, I was using a walker and a cane.
Jen Hardy [00:06:22]:
And I don’t use either one of those things anymore. Wow. It is, yeah, absolutely incredible. And the doctors here keep saying, why do you say there’s something wrong with you? You’re fine.
Bernie Borges [00:06:32]:
Well, apparently, there is nothing wrong with you. And clearly, as I was reading your bio, which is, you know, amazing, you’ve accomplished so much. And, who’da thunk just 6 or 7 years ago, which really in the grand scheme of those of us that are over 50, in my case over 60, 5 or 6 years ago, 7 years ago, that’s nothing. Right? That’s like almost last month. And look at where you are now. So you are a great inspiration to so many people, Jen. I don’t know how many people know that about you because, you know, I’ve listened to not every episode, but I’ve listened to many episodes of your podcast. And you were so upbeat.
Bernie Borges [00:07:11]:
You’re so calming. It’s like you’re a friend. Like, I’ve gotten to know you, and I wanna call you a friend. But if I didn’t know you at all, and I just listened to your podcast, I’d feel like you’re my friend. You know, that’s that’s the the demeanor that you have on an audio podcast. And then on YouTube, for anybody who’s watching this on YouTube, please remember, my listener, that the Midlife Phil podcast is available on YouTube. You have to see Jen. She’s gorgeous.
Bernie Borges [00:07:39]:
She’s always put together beautifully. You you look like you just always look that way. You every time I see you, Jen, you are put together perfectly. Like, you could step out of the microphone and and walk across a stage on a in a, like, a glamour show or something like that. And to hear your backstory and for you to almost say it sort of casually, meaning, like, yeah. That that was a chapter of my life, and it it was there in the past, and here I am now. So where I wanna go next in this conversation, there’s so many so many potential places, is how has this changed your perspective on life? Like, how do you approach life having experienced that?
Jen Hardy [00:08:21]:
Oh, it completely changed how I experience everything. Well, let me start by saying I had an experience before that changed. Oh, it’s gonna make me cry. So when I was 14, I have 28 aunts and uncles that I did not know growing up, but I had one great aunt that lived in the state that I lived in, and I knew her. And she was dying of cancer. And this one day, I was like, I’m a kid. I don’t wanna go see her. I’m sick of going to see her.
Jen Hardy [00:08:51]:
Well, that’s the day she passed. The day, you know, that night she passed. And I missed seeing her. And so, at that moment, I thought, you know, I’m never gonna leave anyone ever without telling them I love them and ending it right. And so that’s really kinda stuck with me, and it’s I think it’s really helped me. It saved a lot of relationships because, you know, it if another phrase I’ve heard is, do you wanna be right or do you wanna have a relationship? So those two things have really saved me with people. But when you think that you’re not gonna make it, you really learn to spend every moment loving life. And you have to make a conscious decision because so my my podcast when I started was called The Sick Mom’s Guide, and it was for moms with chronic illness because there wasn’t anything except people complaining.
Jen Hardy [00:09:42]:
And I didn’t want we don’t need any more complaining when you don’t feel well. And I wanted solutions for these women. So, you know, when you have 7 kids and you are in bed, you need a lot of solutions. And, it it could have been really depressing. And I think for a little while, you know, you go through those 7 stages. But when I got through that, I thought, you know, every day that I’m here is a gift. Every day I get to see my children is a gift. And I’m going to do something I enjoy every single day and set goals for the future whether or not the future is there.
Jen Hardy [00:10:12]:
Because if it is there, I can enjoy them. And that’s what I’ve done. And it’s wild how this is. You know? And I think I did the I did the episode on the YouTube show to tell everyone because I keep saying all these great things. 2024 has been incredible. And but it’s not bragging. It’s not bragging. It’s saying, if I could be there, and I’m not supposed to be here today, and I was literally dying, and I can get podcast of the year and broadcast of the year, and have this show go crazy, and have YouTube partner managers at 56, and do all these things, that anybody can do it.
Jen Hardy [00:10:50]:
You know? It’s not just me. It’s not luck. It’s that I’ve I you know, it was a 8 year overnight success. That’s actually the first chapter in my new book because it does look like an overnight success, but it was a lot of hard work and while I was sick. But I think if you do something positive when you’re going through something like that, it helps you heal.
Bernie Borges [00:11:12]:
Yeah. You you took the words right out of my my mouth on that, Jen. That that was exactly where I was going in my mind. Like, you have had this motivation to do this. You have just given it your all and I can’t imagine anything but what you just said, that it’s helped you to heal. But I actually do wanna unpack a little bit your motivation. Like, why did you choose to do a podcast and a YouTube show? Like, what is it that motivated you, inspired you, or however you wanna characterize it? Why did you do both?
Jen Hardy [00:11:48]:
So I had the podcast, and then I I changed it over to Fabulous over 50 because I went to Podfest, which I think is where we met. And Mhmm. I thought, you know, I gotta stop talking about being sick. It’s depressing. I don’t wanna introduce myself as this sick person. What would be fun, and what’s not being dealt with a lot? And, of course, right after I started mine, Julia Louis Dreyfus started her podcast, Wiser Than Me, and, you know, the rest is history. But, but I thought, you know, everyone kept saying put it on YouTube. Put it on YouTube.
Jen Hardy [00:12:19]:
And I thought, I don’t wanna put my podcast in YouTube. I don’t wanna do video. I grew up in LA. In LA, once you’re 40, you’re done. And I’m over 50. Why would I want to be out there, you know, putting myself out there? And everyone kept pushing and I thought, okay, you know what? I’m just gonna put one episode on YouTube. Just see what happens. Now keep in mind, Bernie, in 2022, I did a 30 day series on YouTube.
Jen Hardy [00:12:42]:
I worked 14 hour days. It was blood, sweat, and tears when I wasn’t feeling well, and I had a total of 38 subscribers and a 100 views when I was done. And that was so depressing. And so YouTube was not really a draw for me. And, but I thought, you know, whatever. I’ll put it up. And I thought shower thoughts are so fun. I love shower thoughts, but nobody does them in the shower.
Jen Hardy [00:13:06]:
And so I got a robe and I blinged it out because, you know, fabulous over 50, it’s all about glitter and everything. And I batched a 100, and I put them up 3 3 to 4 a day for a month with that interview, and I just sat back. And it was just to be fun. It wasn’t even I wasn’t going for success. It just was fun. And I had won my first podcast of the year award at the beginning of this year, which kind of lit a fire. You know? But 3 weeks into, after I had put those things up, I was monetized on YouTube, and it was going crazy. And I thought, oh my gosh.
Jen Hardy [00:13:44]:
Maybe we’re on to something. So we batched out a couple hundred more shower thoughts and kept putting them up. And like you said, we had a half a 1000000 views at 3 months. We had a 1000000 views at 6 months, and then 2,000,000 views at 8 and a half months. So it’s working. It is working. I have 2 partner managers now with YouTube. I get invited to go to YouTube parties.
Jen Hardy [00:14:05]:
They send me presents. It is so much fun. And now I don’t wanna quit. Now I am on a roll with it. I love it.
Bernie Borges [00:14:13]:
I think, first of all, I wanna just make a comment about shower thoughts. They’re very entertaining. And just for the listener, I wanna repeat what you said. You’re wearing a robe. See, you are very clothed.
Jen Hardy [00:14:25]:
Yes.
Bernie Borges [00:14:25]:
And if I’m not mistaken, you’re using, like, a shower head as a pretend microphone. Right?
Jen Hardy [00:14:31]:
Yes. Yes. It’s very low tech. I hold my iPhone in one hand and the shower nozzle in the other hand. There’s no mics. There’s no anything. It’s just me standing there, but very modestly dressed in the shower. That seems to be a question.
Jen Hardy [00:14:47]:
No sexy grandmas. No. Just
Bernie Borges [00:14:50]:
Right. Dressed.
Jen Hardy [00:14:51]:
Yeah. Yeah.
Bernie Borges [00:14:51]:
Yeah. No. That’s great. And they’re they’re always entertaining. They’re always like
Jen Hardy [00:14:55]:
Oh, thanks.
Bernie Borges [00:14:55]:
That’s interesting. I I have a, a theory. Tell me, I have not shared this with you before. So I think that one of the reasons that YouTube really likes you is aside from the fact that you’re producing quality video. That’s certainly always gonna be a prerequisite for them. Right? But you are in a demographic that I think they’re interested in expanding. I think you represent us, this demographic of over 50, and you represent it so fabulously. A little pun intended there.
Bernie Borges [00:15:30]:
And and I think that’s part of the appeal to them. Great content and a demographic that appeals to them. What do you think?
Jen Hardy [00:15:37]:
Honestly, I maybe that is it. Yeah. I don’t know. Everybody wants everybody is calling me and having me tell them how I do everything so they can do the same thing, and I don’t know. I can tell everyone what I know. I wrote a book about it. I did a video series about it because I can’t explain it every single day. But I think, yes, I think they’re realizing that we are a force.
Jen Hardy [00:16:01]:
You know, this Gen X, Boomer, you know, thing is not going away. We are here, and we are a huge demographic. And also, we have the money. And I think that’s something that people forgot about for a little while, You know, because they were focusing on, oh, kids have money now and kids can do things, but they forget that we have a spending power aside from sheer numbers. The county I’m in in Florida, 50% is over the age of 50, and a third is over 65. We’ve got a lot of seniors here, but also everywhere. And I think it’s time, honestly, that these big companies and our culture starts recognizing us as equally important.
Bernie Borges [00:16:46]:
So I think the last point you made is a really key point and that’s our culture in general. There is very much a youth centric culture out there. I’m very very critical of it when I visit a website, any brand’s website, site. I look at the photos and as I’m sure you’ve noticed as well, Jim. In most cases, most of the time, not all the time, most of the time, the photos are of people young. Twenty’s, thirties. Usually, in many cases, don’t see anybody that might even appear to be 40 or over 40. And, to your point, I think that, society in general, and in this case, I think YouTube has taken notice that you represent the demographic in a very sophisticated way, as well as fun and authentic.
Bernie Borges [00:17:37]:
And I think that’s, getting recognized by YouTube and and giving you some wonderful success.
Jen Hardy [00:17:44]:
Yeah. And it’s, you know, it’s nice because if people wanna go out and make themselves look younger by whatever means that they want to, I think people should be able to do whatever they want to do. But I also think there needs to be people out there like me, like you, where we’re just being ourselves. Right? We’re letting people see. I mean, I’m making an assumption with you. I don’t know. Maybe maybe you I don’t know. The Botox is a thing.
Jen Hardy [00:18:06]:
But for me, it’s it’s not a thing. And I just wanna let people know that it’s okay to age naturally and age gracefully, and and it’s a beautiful thing too. And I really wish we could get that back in our culture. I really do. So many cultures honor people as they age. And I think with people like you and me out there, hopefully, we can help remind people that we’ve got a lot of great things to say. And we’ve got decades left. You know? Absolutely.
Jen Hardy [00:18:36]:
It’s not over.
Bernie Borges [00:18:37]:
Oh, absolutely. And, you know, as you know, Jen, I just recently transitioned from, being employed full time to going all in on not just the podcast, more than the podcast, but speaking, training, delivering workshops around fulfillment centric leadership. So I’m all in on that. So I’m back into an entrepreneurial chapter, which I was in for 19 years before I had my most recent corporate job. And and I’m doing this at the age of 67. And I remember when I was having some exit interviews at my now previous, employer, one of them was, so Bernie, I kid you not. So Bernie, are you gonna retire now? And, you know, I didn’t show it, but I was offended by that because the only reason the question was asked because was the individual that asked the question knew my age. You know, it’s it’s in my record.
Bernie Borges [00:19:30]:
You know, HR has your record. They know your age. And that was how the conversation started. So are you gonna retire now? And no. I’m not retired. I am absolutely pedal to the metal on this chapter, excited, full of energy, and, you know, and I know the same goes for you, Jen, the only thing that I will say is, I do not do 14 hour days. I have done them. I did them for many years, but I intentionally don’t.
Bernie Borges [00:19:58]:
Because one of the reasons that I’m able to do what I do with energy is a lot of good self care. Sleep, exercise, eat well, and did I mention sleep? So Sleep. 14 hour days don’t go well with sleep. Right? So but anyway, I’ve got the energy. I’ve got the enthusiasm, and I know you have it as well. And I think that we can both, with pride and humility, hold ourselves up as an example of people. And I know there’s many others like us that are really enter high high energy and committed to this chapter of our lives, and we’re doing it with abundant energy and love and enthusiasm.
Jen Hardy [00:20:36]:
Absolutely. And I do not plan on working 14 hour days past December. I’ve given my I told my family months ago, this is a just just temporary thing, and come December 31st, I will be changing that. I’ve hired an assistant that’s editing some of my videos now, and, yeah, that’s gonna slow down.
Bernie Borges [00:20:56]:
But, Jenn, I have good news for you. Then that’s in the past because this is publishing in January. So okay. So we are in a new year now. What’s in store for Jenn Hardy and all of your amazing content in 2025?
Jen Hardy [00:21:14]:
I am doing a lot of traveling this year, Bernie. And I am so excited about that. I’m traveling solo, which is not something that I normally do. I’m gonna go to Podfest in January, and then I’m going to Vegas for a retreat in February, which will be well earned after last year’s crazy days. And then in May, I’m gonna go to the pod podcast show in London, and then see my daughter who’s in Germany. So it’s gonna be a wild ride, but I’m very excited and looking forward to it. And everything is content. Right? So all these trips are gonna be incredible content for my channel.
Bernie Borges [00:21:50]:
So you will continue to publish podcast episodes. What about the shower thoughts?
Jen Hardy [00:21:57]:
Shower thoughts may end up happening in different showers. This may be a new thing, which will be kind of exciting. So, yeah. I did a class just recently learning how to go viral. And so I’m working on some new kinds of shower thoughts where I’m not just standing still in the shower. So stay tuned for those. They’re gonna be exciting.
Bernie Borges [00:22:17]:
Okay. What what is what is the most interesting thing that you’ve heard, whether it’s feedback or comment or whatever it may be, from somebody that’s either watched your YouTube channel or listened to your podcast? What’s the sort of the the most interesting thing that you’ve heard?
Jen Hardy [00:22:35]:
The most interesting thing and the most rewarding one was somebody listened to my story because I did one about my story on the podcast about 2 years ago, and she said she was on the verge of suicide. And when she heard my story and saw what I had come from, and that I had made it, she could make it through another day. And that was Wow. Huge. So
Bernie Borges [00:22:59]:
Yeah. Yeah. I bet that had a huge impact on you.
Jen Hardy [00:23:03]:
It did. It did. Because up until that point, I thought, you know, I’m just this sick woman telling my sad story, you know? And, I don’t know. It made me realize, well, maybe there’s something to this. Maybe there’s something a little more a little more to this. And, you know, I’ve tried to keep everything upbeat, but, you know, it sometimes it seems like when you have a podcast, sometimes it’s been seems like you’re speaking into the void because you don’t get a lot of feedback from a pod podcast. Like you do on YouTube, you get feedback because there’s a button to push for a comment right there.
Bernie Borges [00:23:36]:
Yeah. So Yeah. Exactly. So if I was to ask one of your adult children, tell me something about Jen, your mom, that I don’t know. What do you think they might say?
Jen Hardy [00:23:48]:
Oh, that I was a horribly strict parent.
Bernie Borges [00:23:51]:
Really?
Jen Hardy [00:23:52]:
Super super conservative and horribly strict, and it drove them all crazy. Yeah. So I’ve learned to calm down a little bit and be a little bit freer with everything. And, yeah, be a little bit more reasonable with the last two children that we have here. I pushed them very hard. Now they are all very successful. So I’m just gonna say and they did all thank me when they went to college because I made them work at home and do all kinds of things, and they could all run a household by the time they were 18. And that was my goal because I couldn’t at 18.
Jen Hardy [00:24:29]:
I was on my own and floundering, and I never wanted my kids to have that. But I think I maybe took it too far.
Bernie Borges [00:24:36]:
So my 2 adult children as well, age 33 and 28, families of their own, successful. They said the same thing. They thanked me and my wife for, you know, just raising them with the discipline that we raised them. So I can totally relate. Okay. I’m gonna ask you this next question. Same question, except instead of your kids, your husband Dave, if I ask Dave what, what do you do do you know, Dave, about Jen that we don’t know that you’d be willing to share?
Jen Hardy [00:25:08]:
Did I sleep in really late? I am not a boring person. And so even though I work late, but I don’t get going. This morning, I was up at 7. That is very abnormal. I usually I won’t even make an appointment until after 11 in the morning.
Bernie Borges [00:25:23]:
Really?
Jen Hardy [00:25:24]:
And he’s a morning person, so that’s not his favorite thing about me.
Bernie Borges [00:25:28]:
So then during the week then, what’s your average wake up time?
Jen Hardy [00:25:33]:
Wake up 8 or 9, but get out of bed 10, 11 if I can get away with it.
Bernie Borges [00:25:37]:
No kidding.
Jen Hardy [00:25:38]:
So my body still does not feel great, and mornings are very hard. So Okay. It takes me about an hour to get out of bed. But then once I’m up and going, I don’t think about that, and I just keep going and it’s positive. But that first hour is is a little rough. Yeah.
Bernie Borges [00:25:55]:
Yeah. Well Jen, you are a wonderful inspiration. You are just a bright light in this world. In so many ways. Metaphorically and also visually as well. I love what you’re doing with your content. I love your story. I’m sorry that you had to go through that and endure that.
Bernie Borges [00:26:15]:
But, on the other side of that, you are touching a lot of people, reaching a lot of people with a great message and a lot of great inspiration. And I wanna thank you for sharing your story with me here today on this vulnerable conversation episode. Any closing thought you wanna share?
Jen Hardy [00:26:33]:
Actually, there is. So for someone who’s listening and you’re going through something horrible, as unfortunately we do, just remember you know, one of my my sons asked me why is it that we just went through this period of about 5 years where it just seemed like everything was hitting us from every side, And he said, why is it always us? And I said, you know, we’ll never know. But out of this, we can do 2 things. We can either wallow in it, which is not the option, or we can keep moving forward and help other people when they go through this. Because now we know what it’s like. We know how to get through it. And we can reach down and pull someone else up. So if you’re going through it, you may not know why ever.
Jen Hardy [00:27:15]:
And that’s okay. And that’s hard to make peace with sometimes. But just be prepared to help the next person, and you will get through it so much easier.
Bernie Borges [00:27:24]:
Great advice, Jen. And give a shout out to your show so people can follow you and connect with you.
Jen Hardy [00:27:30]:
Okay. The Jen Hardy Show on YouTube. But if you go to jennhardy.net, everything’s there. Links for everything. Books, podcasts, TV or not TV. Not yet. Not yet. YouTube.
Jen Hardy [00:27:42]:
We watch me on TV. It’s weird when the kids turn on YouTube, and I’m there. But, yeah.
Bernie Borges [00:27:48]:
All that will be linked up in the show notes. Jen, thank you so much for joining me today. It’s been a pleasure.
Jen Hardy [00:27:53]:
Oh, thank you, Bernie. It the pleasure has been all mine. I appreciate it.
